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Happy Ending…Finally! By John Barbour 9-8-14
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This little incident may not mean anything to anyone except
me; but it was so unexpected it put a smile on my face that is still there.
Maybe it'll put one on yours. This morning around 10am I was returning from a golf outing, and since I have a lifetime pass to America's Parks, on my way home I decided to use it and take a shortcut through Lake Mead Recreational Park to get to the house sooner. It was a beautiful sunny day with absolutely no traffic except a few elderly women on bicycles whom I just flew by. At 80 miles an hour. I wasn't aware of my speed, or even the red lights flashing behind me. I was happily daydreaming. It's when I heard the sirens almost at my rear bumper that I glanced at the speedometer. 'Oh, God,' I thought. 'Do I ever deserve this ticket.' I knew the routine, so I pulled out my license, registration, and proof of insurance, rolled down the window, and handed them immediately to the tall young officer with the usual extra large sunglasses, chuckling as I did so at my stupidity. 'Do you know you were going 80 in a fifty zone?' he asked stiffly. 'No. I didn't notice it till I heard your siren. Officer, it's a good thing you stopped my car, but damn it, you stopped a really nice daydream.' I was still chuckling. He stared at me probably wondering what meds I was on, then returned to his vehicle where he took forever checking me out. When he returned with his ticket book in his hand, he said, 'You know it's easy for older folks to sort of wonder off-' 'Hey, wait a minute, I almost yelled at him. 'I don't know what kind of golf handicap you have, but I could probably beat you every time.' 'Sir, you could probably beat me at a lot of things. I'm not just saying that because of your age.' Just then, two of the elderly cyclists I'd whizzed by looked over, pleased that I'd been nailed by the law. 'Officer, officer, look I said, pointing. 'Like Clint Eastwood, you just made their day. Look at those smiles.' He chuckled. 'Mr. Barbour, when was the last time you were stopped?' 'A month ago. I answered my cell phone on the freeway while driving next to a cop car. My wife sometimes has real lousy timing.' 'And that's it?' 'Sure. You already know that. That's what took you so long.' 'Mr. Barbour, are you prepared to pay a $425.00 ticket?' He stared at me again. 'Officer, are you prepared to hear my daydream?' He didn't know what to say; so I just kept going. 'You're probably much too young, but do you have any interest in the Kennedy assassination?' He really didn't want to answer, but he did. 'Yes, but I was born in '79!' 'You saw 'JFK' with Kevin Costner?' 'Yeah. Great film.' 'The guy Costner played was named Jim Garrison, former New Orlean's DA.' 'That's right. I remember vaguely.' 'Well, in ten years after the Shaw trial Mr. Garrison only gave one interview about his case, and that was to me...the guy you're giving the $425.00 ticket to. And I produced what folks say is the best documentary ever produced about JFK's murder.' 'Really? he asked. 'Really. Do you ever go on Amazon?' Now he really smiled. 'Mr. Barbour, I live on Amazon.' 'Well, you go back to your car or your home and you go there and search 'The Last Word On The Assassination.' 'My parents love that stuff.' 'Well, get it for them. they'll love you even more than they do now. And what I was daydreaming about is that on Nov. 22nd in Arlington, Texas, I've been invited by the 'JFK Assassination Conference' to come there and speak about it.' He nodded his head in absolute disbelief at had what transpired. You could see him thinking, 'On this job you hear everything.' Slowly he handed back my license, registration and proof of insurance. 'Mr. Barbour, on your way out, please keep it down to fifty; and don't scare any more little old ladies.' 'Thank you, officer.' Then to himself he muttered, 'Geez, I thought it was gonna cost you money; now it's gonna cost me. Have a good day.' |
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