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The Yellow Peril Of Portland
By TC Burnett
Does this idiot have cameras pointing at the sky to watch for pooping pigeons and defecating doves? Obviously he has no family or pets. Or even any friends. He cannot ever have had any physical contact with another human being without obsessing whether the person washed and disinfected after they visited the 'facility'. He can never have eaten at a restaurant. He cannot ever had been in a swimming pool or even in the ocean - don't you KNOW what FISH do in the OCEAN? Heck, go to any pool in the world where the water is cold. It's always warmer by little kids. They are pee-machines. So are the tiny bugs which pollinate vegetables.
Son, don't you know the FDA allows 96.5 rat hairs per box of commercial cereal? Chocolate can't LEGALLY have more than 10 milligrams of rat feces and insect parts per pound (those little crunchy things). So 8 ounces of nearly sterile water in 7.8 MILLION gallons? What happens when it rains? RAIN ISN'T STERILE - especially in Portland. It's radioactive.
I hate to rant about peeing, but COME ON! He wasted 7.8 MILLION gallons of precious water because someone poured a used beer into it? Peeing in the reservoir is going to go viral - probably in more ways than one. It will be THE thing to do. Buy your David Schaff "I PEED IN PORTLAND" mask today!
Portland Reservoir Gets Drained After Man Urinates In It
By Olivia B. Waxman
Topics: dave stone, josh seater, Molalla, mount tabor, nation, Oregon, oregon state university, pee, portland, portland water bureau, urine, water
Reservoir at Mount Tabor Park in Portland, Oregon.
Wikimedia Commons
Think back to your summer camp days: remember how annoying it was to evacuate the swimming pool when a kid had an accident? Turns out a similar thing happened in an Oregon reservoir this week.
The Portland Water Bureau got pretty pissed off when cameras caught 21-year-old Josh Seater from Molalla, Oregon, urinating in a reservoir in Mount Tabor Park at about 1:30 am Wednesday morning.
The Bureau spent about $36,000 to drain the 7.8 million-gallon open reservoir, a major water source for the city's residents.
David Shaff, administrator of the Portland Water Bureau, argued that the draining was justified because the thought of someone whizzing in the water would make residents stop drinking tap water.
Yesterday, KATU followed-up with the culprit, who apologized. He said he was drunk, and he didn't realize that he was peeing in a water supply because it was so dark outside: "I thought it was a sewage plant."
(MORE: Delta Airlines's Dirty Secret: Rat Feces and Urine Found on Plane)
But fortunately for Portlanders, urine is pretty much chemically sterile, Dave Stone, assistant professor of Toxicology at Oregon State University told The Oregonian.
"It's inappropriate behavior. But how many animals are doing that or birds?" he said. "I don't want to second-guess the city, but I can't think of anything chemically that would have me be concerned."
Dr. Gary Oxman, the Multnomah County health officer who advises the city on infectious disease issues, also explained to the The Oregonian that the typical bladder holds a mere 6-8 ounces of water, which should quickly dilute in the reservoir and pose negligible health risks. That news should relieve Portland residents.
Read more: http://newsfeed.time.com/2011/06/18/portland-reservoir-ge
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