- Hillary said to Barack O.
- Boo Hoo Hoo! I ain't no ho'!
-
- And behold and lo, it worked like a charm
- New Hampshire folks all left the farm
-
- And cast their votes for Mrs. Clinton
- Of things to come it could be hintin'
-
- Like Wild Bill back in White House saddle
- And Maya Angelou our brains to addle
-
- ("She's mah fav-rit poet," said Prez-dent Bill
- And lots of other lightweight swill)
-
- So it's all come down, you wait and see,
- to which black lady gets to be
-
- the president's first spiritual guide
- And in the Lincoln room reside:
-
- Angelou or puffy Oprah
- She's the country's TV Pope, rah!
-
- For U.S. electness, it's a duel
- Of political correctness, and we the fool
-
- Barack's high card is "girlfriend" Winfrey
- While Wild Bill's is faithful Hillary!
-
- (Oh, it's the other way, of course
- Bill is just Hill's stalking horse)
-
- It's one great, reeking, trite soap Oprah
- Think it's hard so far to cope, ya
-
- Ain't seen nothin' yet; your fears
- Weren't left behind with Hillary's tears
-
- This dirt-dumb race is based on skin
- And who just spoke the bigger sin:
-
- Hillary's talk of LBJ'in'
- Or Obama's cagey hope-a-sayin'
-
- You know that Hill said MLK
- Wasn't worth a bale of hay
-
- Compared to President Lyndon Baines's
- Signing' laws that ended pains-es
-
- Of black American persecution
- That was America's restitution!
-
- Of course she didn't really diss old King
- 'Twas tall O-Man who put the sting
-
- In Clinton's seeming slam at Martin
- Which brings us to the real heart in
-
- This whole madness, all the blather
- (It almost makes you miss Dan Rather)
-
- Why don't these prancing martinets
- Get out some horns and clavinets
-
- And just blow noise at one another
- And all the nightly news, oh brother
-
- Williams, Gibson, CNN
- Don't have the depth of Eminem
-
- You watch the news, do you believe it?
- Brain in toilet, can you retrieve it?
-
- These fine prospective nominees
- Have thinking people on their knees
-
- While they debate on who took dope
- And who evokes more sense of hope
-
- And who can speak the buzz-word, "change"
- The most in a debate exchange
-
- (While spending bills like game board cash
- Enough to give Greenspan a rash)
-
- And so they've made the sorry race
- Into a tete-a-tete on. . .race!
-
- It's pure slick Willie slitherin' slidin'
- To call O. "nigger" by dodgin', hidin'
-
- Behind MLK, of things ironic
- Next they'll be weepin', melancholic
-
- Over dirty trickster accusation
- "Can't we keep things elevatin'?"
-
- What we need is good old Monica
- To come back and blow on Bill's harmonica
-
- To get old lady Hill a-weepin'
- And up the polls her numbers creepin'
-
- Divorce would be a sure-fire way
- To win the hearts of the USA!
-
- But this, of course, ain't gonna happen
- Bill's old dog is mostly nappin'
-
- And so we're left with less excitin'
- Ranting, raving, and testifyin'
-
- The O-man wants the world a-thinkin'
- He's Kennedy, King, and maybe Lincoln
-
- And Oprah shouts, from sea to sea
- Win with me and you'll be free
-
- And Mrs. B. will straighten you out:
- "Barack's a slob, but have no doubt
-
- He'll change the world, not just D.C.
- He's the man of the future, can't you see?"
-
- Well, many a soul just swallow it all
- That "hope" is O-man's beck and call
-
- (Never mind Barack's a smoker
- At least he not a lying toker!)
-
- He's walking, talking harmony
- Half-black, half-white, part Galilee
-
- And never mind that snide remark to
- Hillary, it was just a lark---
-
- Barack O.'s the man to reign
- Fuggedabout his middle name
-
- (Hussein, it is, so conspiracy theorist
- Can claim he's just Islamicist)
-
- The crux of this sad, sorry matter:
- Is there's no substance in his patter!
-
- And Hillary, God---even worse
- Her liveliness is drawn by hearse
-
- "Process," "voice," and "change"
palaver
- Could not compete with Ford's cadaver
-
- And for content's wretched sake
- I must point out her hollow, fake
-
- "End the war" triangulation
- Is empty as her fluctuation
-
- About the vote to give Bush power
- To nuke the world down to last flower
-
- And let us not to be forgettin'
- That Bushes and Clintons are a-settin'
-
- Down together to schmooze and booze
- And man-talk 'bout some female flooze
-
- These royal scions are kissin' cousins
- Of each other and Arab dozens
-
- Mwah and mwah on cheeks they pucker
- And think inside, you mother---Duck! Er. . .
-
- So much crap is raining down
- We need a toilet paper crown
-
- And no substantial observation
- On this election situation
-
- Would carry any real weight
- Without acknowledging Israel's fate
-
- Whoever's prez, hey, it's a lock that
- He or she's in AIPAC's pocket. . .
-
- And now before I end these couplets
- There's one more bit of cynical muck, let's
-
- Sum things up with proper grimness
- (As our wittedness is getting dimness)
-
- The other side boasts things still worse
- Than Hillary or Obama curse
-
- I mean, elect a guy who thinks the earth
- Was conjured just before his birth?
-
- Huckabee, now there's a name
- That makes you think of honey and Twain
-
- That wall-eyed crackpot former fat man
- Thinks Jesus Christ is just like Batman
-
- And then there's Mormon Romney, Mitt
- Who obviously is full of sh, quiet, it
-
- Sounds like a funeral when he's talkin'
- As if a nice pine box he's hawkin'
-
- Elect that guy and see how gorey
- Is the world's return to Christian guy-lor-ay!
-
- Then, twitching, barking, and talkin' smack
- John McCain's come fightin' back
-
- You could almost hear the Wall Street sigh
- When McCain knocked Mitt and Huck aside
-
- So goddamn what he's bullgoose looney
- At least he doesn't believe in mooney
-
- Stuff about some underwear
- Protectin' Mitt when life ain't fair. . .
-
- John's part Wayne and part bad hunch
- And not a little out to lunch
-
- His deck is only Kings and Jokers
- He'll get Osama with a red-hot poker!
-
- Or McCain just might turn out mild
- It was a lie, that black love child
-
- It was an orphaned tot he raised
- And that speaks well for someone crazed
-
- Yes, John-boy tends to shout and rage
- Thanks to Vietnam torture cage
-
- Still it might be fun to watch him boil
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