- When you live in the country, you've got to "roll
your own" special places and occasions. And Paradise County is as
country as you can get in the United States.
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- The closest movie theater is 45 minutes away. The closest
restaurant where you need to wear go-to-meetin' clothes instead of jeans
is five hours from here. And the last occasion calling for anything resembling
a formal attitude was my oldest son's wedding four years ago.
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- Last week, Gwen and I had a Roll Your Own Moment that
lasted most of the day. We were on our way to the nearest Wal-Mart when
we discovered that the highway bypass we'd been watching get sliced, blasted
and steamrolled into a mountain for the last two years was open for business.
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- "We've got to take the new road," Gwen said.
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- "But Wal-Mart's on the old road, just a couple of
miles away."
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- "And it'll still be there on the way back. C'mon.
Aren't you the guy who always says, 'The road less traveled is the place
to be?'"
-
- "That's Green Acres," I said. "Green Acres
is the place to be."
-
- But I got her point. The new road wouldn't be the new
road for all that long, so why not take it before it got old?
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- We knew where it went, of course. Around Paradise's neighboring
city of Flippin and then back to the highway. But we didn't know how it
went. What we would see, hear, feel, smell as we drove along.
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- So off Gwen and I drove. Past beautiful bluffs and rolling
hills that were home to houses and farms we'd never known were there before.
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- "What a great barn!" Gwen said. "That's
a lovely property over there, don't you think?"
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- Lovely it was.
-
- Except for the sign that marred our view: "For Sale."
-
- We saw several more For Sale signs. "They must be
selling because of the bypass," I said. "The folks who live here
are being flushed out, like quail."
-
- "The price of progress," Gwen said, shaking
her head.
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- But what progress it was. Before we knew it, we were
on the other side of town, back at the main highway. "Look,"
I said. "We can be at KT's Barbecue in just a few minutes."
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- Gwen grinned. "I wasn't hungry till you said that
"
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- "And now?"
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- She laughed, and off we sped to our favorite place for
lunch. When we finished our repast, we had a new decision to make. Geographically,
KT's is halfway between two Wal-Marts. "Should we go back Flippin
way?" I said to Gwen. "Or go on to the store in Mountain Home,
where they've got a bigger selection?"
-
- "If I were you, I'd stay with Flippin," offered
a bright-eyed woman from another table. "With the new bypass, it'll
take less time. Even including the little detour you need to take while
they clean up this end of the road."
-
- The bypass turned the tide. Back to Flippin Gwen and
I went, noticing even more land and property signs amid the new scenery.
The words "For Sale" dotted the hillside like fallen leaves.
Then, while Gwen was off looking for some gardening supplies, I found Doug
the Dog Breeder at his usual table in the deli area.
-
- "What do you think of the new bypass?" Doug
asked me as I pulled up a chair.
-
- "'It's the place for me,'" I sang. "But
I feel bad for the people whose lives it disrupted."
-
- "I wouldn't worry about them," said Doug. "Those
boys're about to get rich. Property values along the bypass are sky high.
Every bank and chain restaurant in the country is looking to build along
there. A year from now that'll be a five mile strip of mini-malls, my friend."
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- On the way home, I told Gwen what Doug had said.
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- "Mini-malls?" She groaned. "That's not
the country. That's suburbia!"
-
- Which got me to thinking. On the one hand, who can say
it's a bad thing if hard-working neighbors get to fill wallets that have
been way too empty way too long? Or if we wake up one morning with a friendly
neighborhood entertainment multiplex just up the road?
-
- On the other, I lived for over 30 years in a steroidal
suburb called L.A. I've seen every disaster the 'burb way of life can cause.
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- Alas, poor bypass! Are you Michael Landon's TV route
to Heaven -
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- Or ACDC's Top Ten Highway to Hell?
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- Copyright C 2007 by Larry Brody. All rights reserved.
-
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- Author Larry Brody's weekly column, LIVE! FROM PARADISE!
appears on his website, www.larrybrody.com. He has written thousands of
hours of network television, and is the author of "Television Writing
from the Inside Out" and "Turning Points in Television."
Brody is Creative Director of The Cloud Creek Institute for the Arts, the
world's first in-residence media colony. More about his activities can
be seen on www.tvwriter.com and www.cloudcreek.org. He welcomes your comments
and feedback at <mailto:LarryBrody@cloudcreek.org>LarryBrody@cloudcreek.org.
Brody, his wife and their dogs, cats, horses and chickens live in Marion
County, Arkansas. The other residents of the mythical town of Paradise
reside in his imagination.
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