- In my 76th year, the events of my life appear to me,
from time to time, as a series of vignettes. Some were significant; most
were trivial.
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- War is the seminal event in the life of everyone that
has endured it. Though I fought in Korea and the Dominican Republic and
was wounded there, Vietnam was my war.
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- Now 42 years have passed and, thankfully, I rarely think
of those days in Cambodia, Laos, and the panhandle of North Vietnam where
small teams of Americans and Montangards fought much larger elements of
the North Vietnamese Army. Instead I see vignettes: some exotic, some
mundane:
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- *The smell of Nuc Mam. *The heat, dust, and humidity.
*The blue exhaust of cycles clogging the streets. *Elephants moving silently
through the tall grass. *Hard eyes behind the servile smiles of the villagers.
*Standing on a mountain in Laos and hearing a tiger roar. *A young girl
squeezing my hand as my medic delivered her baby. *The flowing Ao Dais
of the young women biking down Tran Hung Dao. *My two years as Casualty
Notification Officer in North Carolina, Virginia, and Maryland.
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- It was late 1967. I had just returned after 18 months
in Vietnam .. Casualties were increasing. I moved my family from Indianapolis
to Norfolk, rented a house, enrolled my children in their fifth or sixth
new school, and bought a second car.
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- A week later, I put on my uniform and drove 10 miles
to Little Creek, Virginia. I hesitated before entering my new office.
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- Appearance is important to career Marines. I was no longer,
if ever, a poster Marine. I had returned from my third tour in Vietnam
only 30 days before. At 5'9", I now weighed 128 pounds - 37 pounds
below my normal weight. My uniforms fit ludicrously, my skin was yellow
from malaria medication, and I think I had a twitch or two.
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- I straightened my shoulders, walked into the office,
looked at the nameplate on a Staff Sergeant's desk and said, "Sergeant
Jolly, I'm Lieutenant Colonel Goodson. Here are my orders and my Qualification
Jacket."
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- Sergeant Jolly stood, looked carefully at me, took my
orders, stuck out his hand; we shook and he asked, "How long were
you there, Colonel?" I replied "18 months this time." Jolly
breathed, you must be a slow learner Colonel." I smiled.
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- Jolly said, "Colonel, I'll show you to your office
and bring in the Sergeant Major. I said, "No, let's just go straight
to his office." Jolly nodded, hesitated, and lowered his voice, "Colonel,
the Sergeant Major. He's been in this job two years. He's packed pretty
tight. I'm worried about him." I nodded.
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- Jolly escorted me into the Sergeant Major's office. "Sergeant
Major, this is Colonel Goodson, the new Commanding Officer. The Sergeant
Major stood, extended his hand and said, "Good to see you again, Colonel."
I responded, "Hello Walt, how are you?" Jolly looked at me,
raised an eyebrow, walked out, and closed the door.
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- I sat down with the Sergeant Major. We had the obligatory
cup of coffee and talked about mutual acquaintances. Walt's stress was
palpable. Finally, I said, "Walt, what's the h-ll's wrong?"
He turned his chair, looked out the window and said, "George, you're
going to wish you were back in Nam before you leave here. I've been in
the Marine Corps since 1939. I was in the Pacific 36 months, Korea for
14 months, and Vietnam for 12 months. Now I come here to bury these kids.
I'm putting my letter in. I can't take it anymore." I said, "OK
Walt. If that's what you want, I'll endorse your request for retirement
and do what I can to push it through Headquarters Marine Corps."
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- Sergeant Major Walt Xxxxx retired 12 weeks later. He
had been a good Marine for 28 years, but he had seen too much death and
too much suffering. He was used up.
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- Over the next 16 months, I made 28 death notifications,
conducted 28 military funerals, and made 30 notifications to the families
of Marines that were severely wounded or missing in action. Most of the
details of those casualty notifications have now, thankfully, faded from
memory. Four, however, remain.
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- MY FIRST NOTIFICATION My third or fourth day in Norfolk,
I was notified of the death of a 19 year old Marine. This notification
came by telephone from Headquarters Marine Corps. The information detailed:
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- *Name, rank, and serial number. *Name, address, and phone
number of next of kin. *Date of and limited details about the Marine's
death. *Approximate date the body would arrive at the Norfolk Naval Air
Station. *A strong recommendation on whether the casket should be opened
or closed.
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- The boy's family lived over the border in North Carolina,
about 60 miles away. I drove there in a Marine Corps staff car. Crossing
the state line into North Carolina, I stopped at a small country store
/ service station / Post Office. I went in to ask directions.
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- Three people were in the store. A man and woman approached
the small Post Office window. The man held a package. The Store owner
walked up and addressed them by name, "Hello John. Good morning Mrs.
Cooper."
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- I was stunned. My casualty's next-of-kin's name was
John Cooper!
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- I hesitated, then stepped forward and said, "I beg
your pardon. Are you Mr and Mrs. John Cooper of (address.)
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- The father looked at me-I was in uniform - and then,
shaking, bent at the waist, he vomited. His wife looked horrified at him
and then at me. Understanding came into her eyes and she collapsed in
slow motion. I think I caught her before she hit the floor.
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- The owner took a bottle of whiskey out of a drawer and
handed it to Mr. Cooper who drank. I answered their questions for a few
minutes. Then I drove them home in my staff car. The store owner locked
the store and followed in their truck. We stayed an hour or so until the
family began arriving.
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- I returned the store owner to his business. He thanked
me and said, "Mister, I wouldn't have your job for a million dollars."
I shook his hand and said, "Neither would I."
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- I vaguely remember the drive back to Norfolk. Violating
about five Marine Corps regulations, I drove the staff car straight to
my house. I sat with my family while they ate dinner, went into the den,
closed the door, and sat there all night, alone.
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- My Marines steered clear of me for days. I had made my
first death notification.
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- THE FUNERALS Weeks passed with more notifications and
more funerals. I borrowed Marines from the local Marine Corps Reserve and
taught them to conduct a military funeral: how to carry a casket, how to
fire the volleys and how to fold the flag.
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- When I presented the flag to the mother, wife, or father,
I always said, "All Marines share in your grief." I had been
instructed to say, "On behalf of a grateful nation...." I didn't
think the nation was grateful, so I didn't say that.
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- Sometimes, my emotions got the best of me and I couldn't
speak. When that happened, I just handed them the flag and touched a shoulder.
They would look at me and nod. Once a mother said to me, "I'm so
sorry you have this terrible job." My eyes filled with tears and I
leaned over and kissed her.
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- ANOTHER NOTIFICATION Six weeks after my first notification,
I had another. This was a young PFC. I drove to his mother's house. As
always, I was in uniform and driving a Marine Corps staff car. I parked
in front of the house, took a deep breath, and walked towards the house.
Suddenly the door flew open, a middle-aged woman rushed out. She looked
at me and ran across the yard, screaming "NO! NO! NO! NO!"
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- I hesitated. Neighbors came out. I ran to her, grabbed
her, and whispered stupid things to reassure her. She collapsed. I picked
her up and carried her into the house. Eight or nine neighbors followed.
Ten or fifteen later, the father came in followed by ambulance personnel.
I have no recollection of leaving.
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- The funeral took place about two weeks later. We went
through the drill. The mother never looked at me. The father looked at
me once and shook his head sadly.
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- ANOTHER NOTIFICATION One morning, as I walked in the
office, the phone was ringing. Sergeant Jolly held the phone up and said,
"You've got another one, Colonel." I nodded, walked into my
office, picked up the phone, took notes, thanked the officer making the
call, I have no idea why, and hung up. Jolly, who had listened, came in
with a special Telephone Directory that translates telephone numbers into
the person's address and place of employment.
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- The father of this casualty was a Longshoreman. He lived
a mile from my office. I called the Longshoreman's Union Office and asked
for the Business Manager. He answered the phone, I told him who I was,
and asked for the father's schedule.
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- The Business Manager asked, "Is it his son?"
I said nothing. After a moment, he said, in a low voice, "Tom is
at home today." I said, "Don't call him. I'll take care of that."
The Business Manager said, "Aye, Aye Sir," and then explained,
"Tom and I were Marines in WWII."
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- I got in my staff car and drove to the house. I was
in uniform. I knocked and a woman in her early forties answered the door.
I saw instantly that she was clueless. I asked, "Is Mr. Smith home?"
She smiled pleasantly and responded, "Yes, but he's eating breakfast
now. Can you come back later?" I said, "I'm sorry. It's important.
I need to see him now."
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- She nodded, stepped back into the beach house and said,
"Tom, it's for you."
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- A moment later, a ruddy man in his late forties, appeared
at the door. He looked at me, turned absolutely pale, steadied himself,
and said, "Jesus Christ man, he's only been there three weeks!"
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- Months passed. More notifications and more funerals.
Then one day while I was running, Sergeant Jolly stepped outside the building
and gave a loud whistle, two fingers in his mouth....... I never could
do that..... and held an imaginary phone to his ear.
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- Another call from Headquarters Marine Corps. I took
notes, said, "Got it." and hung up. I had stopped saying "Thank
You" long ago.
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- Jolly, "Where?"
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- Me, "Eastern Shore of Maryland. The father is a
retired Chief Petty Officer. His brother will accompany the body back
from Vietnam ...."
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- Jolly shook his head slowly, straightened, and then said,
"This time of day, it'll take three hours to get there and back. I'll
call the Naval Air Station and borrow a helicopter. And I'll have Captain
Tolliver get one of his men to meet you and drive you to the Chief's home."
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- He did, and 40 minutes later, I was knocking on the father's
door. He opened the door, looked at me, then looked at the Marine standing
at parade rest beside the car, and asked, "Which one of my boys was
it, Colonel?"
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- I stayed a couple of hours, gave him all the information,
my office and home phone number and told him to call me, anytime.
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- He called me that evening about 2300 (11:00PM). "I've
gone through my boy's papers and found his will. He asked to be buried
at sea. Can you make that happen?" I said, "Yes I can, Chief.
I can and I will."
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- My wife who had been listening said, "Can you do
that?" I told her, "I have no idea. But I'm going to break my
ass trying."
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- I called Lieutenant General Alpha Bowser, Commanding
General, Fleet Marine Force Atlantic, at home about 2330, explained the
situation, and asked, "General, can you get me a quick appointment
with the Admiral at Atlantic Fleet Headquarters?" General Bowser
said, "George, you be there tomorrow at 0900. He will see you."
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- I was and the Admiral did. He said coldly, "How
can the Navy help the Marine Corps, Colonel." I told him the story.
He turned to his Chief of Staff and said, "Which is the sharpest
destroyer in port?" The Chief of Staff responded with a name.
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- The Admiral called the ship, "Captain, you're going
to do a burial at sea. You'll report to a Marine Lieutenant Colonel Goodson
until this mission is completed..."
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- He hung up, looked at me, and said, "The next time
you need a ship, Colonel, call me. You don't have to sic Al Bowser on my
ass." I responded, "Aye Aye, Sir" and got the h-ll out of
his office.
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- I went to the ship and met with the Captain, Executive
Officer, and the Senior Chief. Sergeant Jolly and I trained the ship's
crew for four days. Then Jolly raised a question none of us had thought
of. He said, "These government caskets are air tight. How do we
keep it from floating?"
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- All the high priced help including me sat there looking
dumb. Then the Senior Chief stood and said, "Come on Jolly. I know
a bar where the retired guys from World War II hang out."
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- They returned a couple of hours later, slightly the worst
for wear, and said, "It's simple; we cut four 12" holes in the
outer shell of the casket on each side and insert 300 lbs of lead in the
foot end of the casket. We can handle that, no sweat."
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- The day arrived. The ship and the sailors looked razor
sharp. General Bowser, the Admiral, a US Senator, and a Navy Band were
on board. The sealed casket was brought aboard and taken below for modification.
The ship got underway to the 12- fathom depth.
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- The sun was hot. The ocean flat. The casket was brought
aft and placed on a catafalque. The Chaplin spoke. The volleys were fired.
The flag was removed, folded, and I gave it to the father. The band played
"Eternal Father Strong to Save." The casket was raised slightly
at the head and it slid into the sea.
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- The heavy casket plunged straight down about six feet.
The incoming water collided with the air pockets in the outer shell. The
casket stopped abruptly, rose straight out of the water about three feet,
stopped, and slowly slipped back into the sea. The air bubbles rising
from the sinking casket sparkled in the sunlight as the casket disappeared
from sight forever....
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- The next morning I called a personal friend, Lieutenant
General Oscar Peatross, at Headquarters Marine Corps and said, "General,
get me out of here. I can't take this anymore." I was transferred
two weeks later.
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- I was a good Marine but, after 17 years, I had seen too
much death and too much suffering. I was used up.
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- Vacating the house, my family and I drove to the office
in a two-car convoy. I said my goodbyes. Sergeant Jolly walked out with
me. He waved at my family, looked at me with tears in his eyes, came to
attention, saluted, and said, "Well Done, Colonel. Well Done."
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- I felt as if I had received the Medal of Honor. Jmac
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- A veteran is someone who, at one point, wrote a blank
check made payable to 'The United States of America ' for an amount of
'up to and including their life.'
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- That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this
country who no longer understand it.'
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- Thanks Jack
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- No, freedom isn't free.
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- If you can read this thank a teacher, if you are reading
it in English thank a soldier.
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- Semper fi LtCol semper fi. -- "Poor people have
access to the courts in the same sense that Christians had access to the
lions." - Justice Earl Johnson, Jr.
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- God bless the REPUBLIC with Liberty and Justice for ALL.
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- I am James Elmer :-)
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- If you want off my list send an email with Remove in
the subject line, you will be gone like a wild goose in winter.
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- Jack Perrine
- Jack@Minerva.com
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