- WASHINGTON, DC --
"Here, for your amusement, is an exact copy of an in-house memo sent
to me, and others of my opinions, by one of Bush's senior, and soon-to-be
employed elsewhere, advisors:
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- 'I pity the poor deluded Christians of America who think
the Monkey Palace is a staunch bastion of morality and Christian Family
Values. The only family values this White House knows are those of the
Village People: " We are Family, all my Sisters and me...." There
was much twittering and swishing of tutus around the coffee stations this
last Friday, as White House aides, speechwriters, prayer leaders, and Secret
Service guards discussed their anticipated exploits to be had this coming Saturday
night at the Washington Plaza Hotel at M Street and 14th on Thomas
Circle, where half the queens on the East Coast were to celebrate MAL,
or the Mid-Atlantic Leather annual gay weekend get-together.
-
- I understand Karl Rove and Ken Mehlman went
shares on a 9th-floor suite with the aforesaid Secret Service "fraternity
members" checking ID's at the door. (Only Republicans working
in the White House or in Congress were to be allowed into that particular
Harem Of Joy.) Sadly, missing this year would be Congressman Mark
Foley and his witty post-orgasmic descriptions of the sweaty action,
which everyone in that circle used to anticipate with great hilarity.
(Indeed, all you sorry Christian worshippers of Saint George, not only
were Foley's proclivities well known in the Party, but for many
years he was one of the leading lights at these functions.)
-
- Lest the Reform Jews, always so liberal in these matters,
should feel a touch of sympathy for these happy souls, they should
know that among the hairy studs dressed-up in chains, peaked caps and police
uniforms, there are always at least two or three Heinrich Himmlers and
half a dozen Martin Bormanns. Yes, children, when speaking of today's Republican
Party, one should go lightly on the "Republican" bit, and emphasize
the "Party" .....at least here in the Nut House
on 16th Street.
-
- Meanwhile, nobody picked up on the fact that Bush was
sedated to the eyeballs when he delivered his "Iraqi surge"speech
from the White House library last Wednesday. Everyone must have noticed
how careful and emotionless his elocution was, and perhaps a
few also noticed his long pauses between each sentence. This
was because the Teleprompter operator was warned not to run the script
too quickly in case the high-flying King Kong might be unable
to read that fast. Let us commend the Naked Emperor for
the fact that that this time, for once, his drug of choice was
Prozac, rather than Southern Comfort or Jim Beam.
-
- The Iraq disaster continues to provoke anguish here among
the "Party" faithful, whose numbers dwindle weekly. Everyone
is dreading the inevitable day when the Iraqi insurgents shoot down
a C-130 plane landing at Baghdad Airport and carrying a "surge"
of 300 National Guard fathers, brothers, and sons. When that happens,
and it will, the Blue Plains sewage facility in Anacostia will receive
a large "surge" of ripe fecal material emanating from the Bush
White House. Following this event, Bush himself will weigh only 15 lbs.
and be only two feet high. You know what they say: If Bush dropped dead
suddenly, they could give him an enema and bury him in a shoe box..
-
- And it really is getting that bad here. I know of at
least ten fairly senior staffers here who are totally convinced that Bush
is a lunatic and that they would be better off working elsewhere.
-
- I suppose you have all heard of the senior DoJ officials
who have claimed (this was in the NYT) that any lawyer who dared to represent
the Gitmo people should be fired from their law firms and disbarred!
-
- Now, this is an actual, official view! Jesus H. Christ!
-
- You really ought to work in this place, children. It's
like doing the night shift in a nut house when the moon is full.! George
hasn't been reported as urinating on the carpets in the Oval Office, yet,
but I have a feeling that's next on the Clown House agenda. ('Call Household,
Mavis, and tell them to bring the mops. The Prez is talking to himself
again.')"
-
- The Green Zone Follies
-
- Baghdad, 12 Jan 07: "'Now is the winter of our discontent.'
And it is.
-
- A coming influx of fresh meat and the sodomists and drug
dealers in the ranks are rubbing their hands with glee.
-
- This is going to be a really terrible last act, believe
me. The rag heads know more green troops are coming over here to save Bush's
tattered reputation and they are loading up on armaments, just waiting.
Bush claims, truthfully, that weapons are coming in here from Iran.
-
- He threatens Iran. No one believes him and the weapons,
and trained men, still pour in to Iraq.
-
- We don't have anywhere near enough troops to seal the
borders and deal with the growing insurgency. The other side are using
shaped charge small rockets that blow our vehicles, including tanks, up
and kill the crews. The top brass here knows that we cannot win the war
with 100,000 new men, let alone 20,000 new and green ones.
-
- The drill is to take over an area in Baghdad, kill off
anyone that looks like a resistance person and then garrison it with our
people! Baghdad is a huge, sprawling city and to follow this Bush plan
is pure insanity from the git-go. Can't be done.
-
- And the sheep will be led to the slaughter and the homefolks
will get madder.
-
- The Generals here are very, very unhappy. They do not
dare tell Bush or his butt kissers in the Pentagon the truththat we cannot
win this civil war/resistance movement. There is a terrible parallel
with 'Nam but Bush is so delusional that he can't see it.
-
- Our people can but they can't open their mouths. There
will be no 'final victory' but the high death tolls will get even higher.
-
- One two star fellow who has met with Bush, is telling
everyone that the President is a nut and ought to be sent packing but he
can do nothing. The idea of mutiny is still there and still growing. All
it will take is one incident and the press will rupture itself trying to
keep it under wraps.
-
- My father was a reporter in the south and he used to
say, 'Once a newspaperman, always a whore.' "
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