- The Danish philosopher Søren Kierkegaard wrote
that each of us comes to earth with a sealed envelope containing orders.
We must struggle to find the contents and carry them out. Nobody can do
it for us.
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- It took me many years to perceive the contents of my
envelope. And now that I have I gotten a glimpse, I must admit that it
has not simplified my life. In fact, there are days when I've yearned to
rip it up and toss the pieces in a fire. There are times when I have longed
to find a secluded beach and OM myself into an alternate reality. I have
nostalgically mused upon those halcyon days when I stumbled blindly through
my life, feasting on the bliss of ignorance. And yet, there is no turning
back. Though I still walk into an occasional wall (more than occasionally)
my dharma continues to become clearer. There is no whining K"leave
me alone, let me linger in my comfort zone for just awhile longer."
There is no wrestling with awareness.
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- Dharma is a Sanskrit word that has varied meanings, depending
on the context in which it is used. When I use the word, I am using it
at its most expanded meaning. One must be true to ones essential Divine
nature. This means acting in the spirit of harmony and unity with all things.
We are all part of an indivisible whole. Everything has its own individual
expression, its own purpose, its own role to play. And yet, everything
has its own responsibility and that responsibility is to live in harmony
with the whole. To this, I consecrate my life. That is only a small peek
into the envelope which I carry around with me.
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- The still small voice whispers in my ear reminding me
that on the day when the breath I breathe is my last, I do not want to
be ruminating about missed opportunities. I do not want to know that I
could have made the world a slightly better place but I was too busy embracing
fear and cowardice.
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- September 11, 2001 was a day that catapulted me into
a sense of reality from which there is no retreat. And, on that dreadful
day, the burden of responsibility fell not only on the perpetrators of
this heinous event, but on all of us. We were suddenly called upon to open
our eyes, to question all that we heard and saw, to WAKE UP. Though the
event was beyond jarring and it was too easy to let the mainstream media
lackeys of our government tell us what to think, you did not need 20/20
eyesight to recognize a story filled with anomalies. You did not need a
soaring I.Q. to figure out that we were being lied to. You merely had to
move away from your sitcom du jour and begin your hero's journey in pursuit
of the truth. It sounds so simple and yet, in reality, it is can be dauntingly
difficult.
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- The task grows more complex with each passing day. My
pursuit has led me far from the myths of my childhood. My journey has involved
saying goodbye to old friends and embracing new ones. I have realized the
necessity of leaving the religion of my parents far behind me among the
pages of my earliest scrapbooks, and, in addition, placing all religions
on the page of my past. I have left friends who, in their own confusion
about my pursuits, were reduced to hurling invective. I sadly moved on.
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- But, worst of all, my journey has included betrayal of
a magnitude I still struggle to comprehend. I have learned that trust in
another can be easily misplaced and I must struggle to remain free from
bitterness. I wonder if these are the indelible scars that I must learn
to live with and embrace. For ultimately, I am only responsible for my
own behavior and cannot blame those who are floundering in a sea of lies
and psychic turmoil.
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- Are we on the brink of self-annihilation? Is this, indeed,
the eve of destruction? Has the window of opportunity closed on our freshly
manicured nails? Should we be content to watch the "big game"
on television and ignore the even bigger game of life? Many would say "yes."
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- So, what is your choice? Are you going to pull yourself
away from the television? I'll tell you a secret. There is a larger and
more compelling show in three dimensional reality and you have a starring
role. What part are you going to play?
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- If you should chose to enter into your life fully and
dynamically, be advised that there is a caveat. Once your feet are firmly
planted on that road, it is difficult, if not impossible, to turn back.
Your journey may take you through nightmares that rival your worst childhood
dreams. Your world may flip over on its axis as heroes become villains
and decadence and evil go beyond the grotesque. Your trip may call upon
you to be scrupulously honest. You may have to grapple with loving the
unlovable.
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- Life is a series of choices and they are ours alone to
make. Do not listen to the chorus of naysayers. Do not allow people to
tell you that you are a conspiracy nut or ask you why you are wasting your
time. Recall the words of Aristotle who said:
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- "The high minded man must care more for the truth
than for what people think. "
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- Rest in the awareness that you are spending, not wasting,
your time and, perhaps, you are doing it in the noblest way possible. For,
when stripped of all our toys, all we have is our truth and, on that day
when we leave this physical world, it might be the only thing that we take
with us.
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- As you progress on your journey, your pursuit can easily
become your raison d'être. Your quest can easily become more important
than life itself. You may even begin to think that it is life itself. And,
you may be 100% correct.
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- "When I tell the truth, it is not for the sake of
convincing those who do not know it, but for the sake of defending those
that do." --William Blake
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- "As long as people believe in absurdities, they
will continue to commit atrocities." --Voltaire
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- Copyright 2005 Judy Andreas
- www.judyandreas.com
- JUDE10901@AOL.com
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